Letter Exchange

Letter Exchange

Jimmy to Martha

Greetings Martha, My Love

It has been a few days since we parted ways. If my memory serves me correct, this is a tenth letter I am writing to you without getting a feedback. At times, I feel like you are selfish and afraid to reciprocate love. However, I vividly remember the last time we went to the local cinema hall (Chen, 2012). I knew you loved me because of the chemistry in the air. Today, I do not understand what has changed but my love for you has not. To give you a picture, I carry all the letters in my backpack every day. At all times, I have your good-luck pebble in my mouth, especially when we are on the battlefield. After a long day’s march, I open your poems and as I read, I imagined the prospects of you returning my love someday.

There are times when I drift away in thoughts and memories of you. In your poems, the gesture in your signature betrays some positive emotions towards me. Unless you confirm what I am thinking about it, I cannot allow it to give me a false hope. Last night, I wondered uncontrollably if you are a virgin or not. Either way, I must let you know that I carry your photographs wherever I go, including the one that you play volleyball. They are the only items that keep me closer to you. I also harbour your memories closer to my heart.

Do you remember our first date? How about the movie Bonnie and Clyde? That was the moment when I touched your knee during the last scene (O’Brien, 2011). If I am right, I retracted my fingers because you looked at me with cold disapproving eyes. It was at that moment that I realized how love confused us. Since we were young, I understood that you were afraid to declare your love for me. Today, time has passed by quickly and I am getting impatient. I was innocent and I lost an opportunity to carry you upstairs, tie you to the bed and touch your thighs all night long. Probably, you would not hesitate to return my affection anymore if I executed my plan.

Las week, there was a company here in Vietnam that destroyed tunnel complexes. I imagined that the tunnels were collapsing on me and you. At that moment, I wondered about your virginity and thought continuously about your smooth skin. It did not take long before Lavender, my close friend and mentor, got fatally wounded. I saw him fall on his back as he had a heavy backpack. Yet, I could not rush to pull him back to safety because thoughts of you distracted me. Later on, it sank that my friend and fellow soldier was no more.

Did I cause his death because I was thinking about you while on an active mission? It dawned on me that my love for you is costly, it just took a life and you are not even aware. Therefore, today marks a turning point. You will not receive a letter from me because I will not fantasise about you anymore. I am also burning your poems and photographs since there is no need of holding on to them while you are unresponsive on how I feel about you.

Bye for now.

Jimmy.

Martha to Jimmy

Dear Jimmy

I hope that you are faring well in Vietnam. Back then in 1979 when we reconnected at a college reunion, our conversation went on just fine. I cannot deny that we spent a long time catching up but as we talked, I realized how being apart after school resulted in contrasting passions. Most of the things you were interested in were no longer on my list. I told you that I am a Lutheran missionary and had participated in voluntary work in Mexico, Guatemala, and Ethiopia (Chen, 2012). Were you even listening? We may have started on a wrong footing when I told you that I had never been married and did not know why. If the signal you received is that I was ready for a relationship, receive my sincere apologies. Even if I was, we should first aim at developing a strong bond before moving to the next step. That is what normal people do. The feeling has to be mutual.

If you sought a sign, you should recall the time when you held and squeezed my hand but I did not respond (O’Brien, 2011). You told me you loved me but could not reply because I never took you seriously. We only had one date and it is not enough to conclude mutual feelings. You say that you could have taken me home, tie me to my bed, and kiss my knee throughout the night. While it is one of the dumbest ideas I have ever heard, I agree that you should have considered that bold step when there was a chance. Who knows? Perhaps the tone could be different right now. However, you are half way across the world and we cannot keep doing this. I think that it will never work and it’s time to move on. At the same time, I wish you well and hope to see soon.

Each night before I go to sleep, I pray that the war will be over so that people could resume their lives. It saddens me to see people hurting each other despite. It is hard to explain how a man can turn to his countryman (Wesley, 2012). Maybe it is due to greed or poor leadership. Not that I blame you for participating in the war but maybe it is the system. Whichever way, it reveals the sharp contrast between my convictions and your views. We cannot disregard these and get into a relationship because they will resurface at one point. I suggest that you reset your thoughts and not focus on the short term goals but the long-term impact. What I know is that fantasizing about intimate moments is similar to expressing lust rather than love. If you are interested in my poems, I will be sending more but do not re-interpret my intentions.

Take care.

Martha.

References

Chen, T. (2012). Unraveling the Deeper Meaning": Exile and the Embodied Poetics of Displacement in Tim O'Brien's" The Things They Carried. Contemporary Literature, 39(1), 77-98.

O'brien, T. (2011). The Things they Carried. Boston: Houghton Mifflin Harcourt.

Wesley, M. (2012). Truth and Fiction in Tim O'Brien's" If I Die in a Combat Zone" and" The Things They Carried". College Literature, 29(2), 1-18.