Learning from Failure

Learning from Failure

Mostly, people recall their failures and obsess over different avenues they could have exploited to improve them or to eliminate mistakes. “Could I have done anything differently?” However, there is no need of discovering the answer to this question. Research shows that when an individual focuses on the unforeseen outcomes, chances are that this will hinder his ability to pick himself up and move on boldly in life. Nevertheless, it does not rule out how I view my failures as critical lessons shaping my life in multiple ways.

As I entered into sixth grade, little did I know that my health condition would deteriorate rapidly within a year. It did not take long before my beaming wide smile dwindled into a firm nasty line on my face. With every passing day, food became less appetizing and I rarely enjoyed eating. I became scared. None of my peers could understand the reasons why I stood out.

All my days were under the control of Anorexia Nervosa. At every dawn, I run up and down the staircase, hence each step became labour intensive. Next, I performed strength and abdominal exercises. It was then when I realized that my limbs gradually turned into painful noodles. Usually, I had a breakfast of syrup, peanut butter, and two waffles but my obsession with exercising and body fitness prompted me to switch to a bowl of whole-wheat cereal. In some days, I would go hungry without breakfast. I could hear my conscience telling me it was time to give up and leave the world behind. My mirror, on the other hand, became one of my outstanding scoffers, telling me that I was yet to attain an Ideal weight.

“Just lose 10 more pounds and you will look like a model,” I told myself in front of the mirror.

I started feeling my rib bones protruding under my skin, but I was not satisfied. I still considered myself as unfit. By this time, I was four feet and eight inches and weighed 62 pounds. I was 22 pounds less than the previous year. I lost focus on my class work because I diverted my attention to plucking away brown hair from my head and eyebrows. They became brittle and coarse and lacked the liveliness it once boasted. Often when I walked to the nearby store with my mother, other customers inquired why I looked emaciated. In a month I experienced my worst eating disorder and my parents took me to a medical facility.

Dr. Edison (my psychologist) told me that he was willing to help me conquer the condition and live a life I deserved. His words echoed in my mind because they reminded me that I had a purpose in life. I understood that being a failure did not feature on my list, thus should not be a reason for my early demise. Over the next three weeks, my nutritionist worked hand-in-hand with Dr. Edison to monitor my daily food intake. It took me eight months to fully regain a normal weight of 88 pounds and an additional height of 2 inches. My improving condition was like a miracle because the weight loss had significantly stunted my growth.

At the time when I despaired and considered myself a failure, I was still determined to live. At last, I found my success through being brave and restoring my faith. Today, I reflect on my battle with Anorexia Nervosa as unnecessary cost I had to pay for my failure. Yet, it shaped me into a better person I am today.