Intimacy by Hanif Kureishi

Intimacy by Hanif Kureishi

Intimacy is a novel published in the year 1998. It is centered on a young man that desires women outside wedlock. Therefore, he has thoughts of abandoning his wife and two children. The story has a time span of less than 24 hours and is set in London. It has a strong theme of marriage and the challenges that men face as they try to remain faithful and trustworthy to their partners. The author reveals in detail the main character's thoughts as protagonists and how they threaten to ruin his relationship with a partner of more than 6 years (Kureishi 8).

One day, the man has an idea of disappearing in the middle of the night and never come back to his wife and children. His sexual desires control his thoughts for the rest of the story. In fact, the entire book is a lengthy flow of emotions regarding a male protagonist unbearably lonely and empty in his life and marriage. Jay feels unloved hence his life is meaningless. He sees his wife of many years as a strong lady able to cope with anything that life throws her way. According to him, his wife's feelings are narrowed thus she lives simply. Her character sharply contrasts Jay’s because her other concerns are overridden by practicality like many women of her age. Jay, on the other hand, seems unaware on how his desultory and care-free mind hinders a development of a strong social bond with his family. His desire to escape the ‘prison’ of domestication and the resultant rigors reveals the fragility of marriage as an institution.

In most of the novel, Jay faces a dilemma on why he should abandon his marriage. In his mind, he weighs the options and consequences of the possible choices he has to make (Kureishi 22). According to him, as long as there is no love anymore in a social bond, life becomes dull and futile. However, as he thinks of his son, he is forced to hold back though he is convinced that his children will be fine. He makes comparisons of his life with that of two of his peers. Victor—Jay’s long-time friend—abandoned his wife and is enjoying his new life as a promiscuous bachelor. On the other hand, Alex is fully committed and conditioned to live unhappily as a married man. Despite family shortcomings, he is a proud family man and advises Jay to reconsider his options of staying out of marriage.

Nina occupies the thoughts of Jay. She is a beautiful young woman who has dated him for a while. Nevertheless, at the moment, he lacks an understanding of her position in his life. Kureishi dwells mostly on the theme of marriage experimentally to reflect on his lifestyle. While he views his marriage cynically, his concerns revolve around the inevitability of loneliness as a human condition (Aldama 1098). This begs a question on the possibility of gaining happiness or love outside a marriage institution. In fact, he thinks that loneliness is like an illness that an individual can infect his/her partner. While his lead act is evidently irresponsible, his poignancy touch should be adored. He retorts that if his lifetime partner were to show him love and that she needs him in her life, he would resort not to abandon her and his children.

In summary, it is easier for men than women to relate on the issues raised in Kureishi’s novel. The reason is that the author highlights the troubles of married men and how they make tough decisions to leave or stay in an unhappy social bond.

Works Cited

Kureishi, Hanif. Intimacy and Midnight All Day: A Novel and Stories. Singapore: Simon and Schuster, 2002: 7-148.Print.

Aldama, Frederick Luis. "Intimacy (review)." Callaloo 22.4 (1999): 1097-1100.